We set off for the Lake District early one moonlit morning, through the flooded Eden roads (fields looking like paddy fields with rows of trees poking out of the waters where the River Eden had burst its banks), to the Keswick Climbing Wall. After a breakfast of real cornish pasties, where Kim asked if we could have the buy 2 get 2 free offer (we had to point out that it was buy 10 get 2 free – kim must be thinking in binary) we bypassed the Cumberland pencil museum and found the high wall.
We learnt to tie our rope knots and belay then it came for me to abseil down whilst alasdair belayed – I dropped letting go of the wall and rope and Ali received the largest wedgie he had ever had – he was also tied to a barrel to counteract my weight and his lightness. The climbing instructor just asked Ali – How are your Man Bits? All great fun but we had to go, changing into our funeral garb for the funeral of a friend. There was almost more funerals as Kim hit a patch of deep water across the road, squealed but fortunately the audi patents paid off with computer controlled 4 wheel drive keeping us on the road.
The Jesus church at Troutbeck is set in a most gorgeous valley at the head of Kirkstone Pass, and the church itself is stunning with oak beams and a fantastic stained glass window. A wren was flying around in the church adding a sense of magic to the occasion, along with the dead fox that we parked beside. Music by Catriona McKay played by the celtic band from Kelso High School, was a haunting celtic refrain which with the surroundings made for a phenomenal experience. We threw our soil or scattered petals in the grave and in the rain made our way back to the car when the most gorgeous rainbow appeared apparently terminating in the graveyard and arcing to the town where luncheon was served.
Hymns sung included the pagan fertility carol – The Holly and the Ivy albeit with Christian words tagged on clumsily, and the rather bizarre All Things Bright and Beautiful with the ‘Purple Headed Mountains’ from Martin Shaw’s 17th Century ‘Royal Oak’. At least the Lord’s Prayer was the original one without this ‘Time Of Trial’ nonsense.
We returned over the Kirkstone Pass with very little fuel, not a great place to breakdown, and saw an overflowing lake (overflowing onto the road). We passed through Hawick high street to see the Christmas lights – which are second hand from Monte Carlo.
